Living Together Can Be
by Shannon C. Redfield
Summary: A series featuring two Outbreak survivors. Continuations from Cannibal Jello's first one. The rest are by me. Funny DavidxKevin!
1. Prt 2 The Kitchen

This is a continuation to Cannibal Jello's "Living Together Can Be"

This is scene 2. I have her permission to pick up where she left off. I haven't written anything for her in quite some time, and I felt I owed it to her to keep going.

Anyway, BEFORE you read this please read her's first.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Resident Evil or the first story…but I do however, own this story.

* * *

Living Together Can Be…Annoying. 

Scene 2: The kitchen

--

--

Low mumble.

"Kevin!"

"Yeah?"

"I thought I had told you earlier to do the dishes."

"I did!"

"No you didn't."

"Liar! I did too."

"Really? Then how come there are dirty ones in the sink? Surely you didn't eat _this _much to make a mess so quickly…"

"Maybe I did."

"No, you couldn't have."

"And why not?"

"Because you haven't moved from that couch since nine this morning."

"I have so. A man's gotta get up and pee sometime you know."

"Fuckin' gross—"

"Hey, we _all_ gotta pee, okay? Besides, it's Monday. Isn't it _your _turn to do the dishes?"

"You still haven't done yours, yet."

"I've been working—"

"So have I. But at least I know when it's _my _turn to do the dishes."

"So..?"

"What?"

"Why aren't you doing them if it's _your _turn?"

"Because _you _were supposed to them _yesterday._"

"And…?"

"So you are one day behind."

Towel gets thrown.

"Hey!"

"And wipe the cup marks off the coffee table. I hate it when you don't use the coasters."

Sigh. "Yes, Dave."

"…."

"Kevin?"

"Yes, David?"

"Did you buy more dish soap recently?"

"Uh…yeah."

"Where is it?"

"Um, should be under the sink."

"…."

"I don't see it."

"Should be there."

"…."

"I still don't see it."

"Well, then it might be…"

"…you didn't buy soap, did you?"

Pause.

"Um, no. I didn't."

"And knowing that you had dishes to do, you figured I already knew and therefore got soap so you can get out of doing them for one day."

"Uhh…"

"Am I right?"

"Pretty much."

"…."

"God I hate you."

"Not the first time."

Wallet gets thrown across the room.

"Ow! David, stop throwing stuff!"

"Get up your ass and go buy some more dish soap. That'll be your punishment for thinking you can get away with not doing 'em."

Heavy sigh.

"…."

"And wipe down the coffee table like I asked you!"

Another heavy sigh. "Yes, all high-and-mighty-one."

David leaves room.

"…? ..."

Kevin talks to himself. "Dammit, why does he always whine about the little things?"

"…."

"..I mean, honestly? Does anybody care about water marks?"

"….?"

"Pssh. Sometimes I just don't get it—"

"KEVIIIIIIN!"

Stunned silence.

"Kevin!"

"…."

"Kevin dammit, I know your still here!"

"…y-yes, Dave?"

Thumping footsteps.

"Kevin, I thought I told you a thousand times not to use the bath towels for cleaning off the car with."

"And…?"

"You used them! Christ Kev—there are oil stains smeared on it!"

"I couldn't find any of the usual car towels—"

"Bullshit! They're in the same spot where you always put them."

"Which would be…?"

"In the trunk, you numb-nut. Along with all the other crap you couldn't find."

"Even my Elvis record?"

"…."

"How did you know that?"

"Uh…"

"You knew where everything was all along, didn't you?"

"Gee, when you put it that way…"

"Then why use the bath towels when you knew perfectly well where the dirty rags were at?"

"…."

"I thought so."

"But, David!"

"But what? Come on, Kev. You ruined clean towels!"

"The old ones were looking gooey."

"Then why didn't you wash them?"

"Because I couldn't!"

"You mean you don't know how to use the washing machine—"

"…."

"…."

"Let me guess, Kev. We're out of clothes soap, too. Right?"

"…."

"Am I right?"

"…."

"Dammit Kevin, am I right!"

"…."

"…why are you looking at me like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like that!"

"I dunno. Maybe its just the way you yell."

"It's the only way to get your attention."

"Yeah that, and something else."

"What?"

"….you know, your hot when your angry."

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah. When your face turns red and your voice raises a notch or two—"

"Stop it."

"Why?"

"Because I'm not in the mood."

"You will be soon."

"Yeah. After when you clean the towels—as a matter of fact you'll buy new ones—buy more soap, dish or otherwise, then we'll talk."

"You mean…" Kevin does his hip movement.

"I thought I told you to stop it."

"I know you like it when I do my Elvis impersonation before we get to it."

"Afterwards…_then _we'll talk. Deal?"

Keys are grabbed. "Deal!"

…

-fin part 2


	2. Prt 3 The Dining Room

This is a continuation to Cannibal Jello's "Living Together Can Be" and it's sequel "Living Together Can Be Prt. 2" by me.

This is scene 3.

Anyway, BEFORE you read this please read her's and mine first.

**Warning**: Contains male/male interaction. If this bothers you, please do yourself a favor and not read it. K? You'll only upset yourself further.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Resident Evil or the first story…but I do however, own this story.

* * *

Living Together Can Be…Interesting.

Scene 3: The Dining Room

__

__

"Hey Dave?"

"What?"

"Where's the candles Alyssa gave us?"

"What's it matter?"

"C'mon! Their good candles!"

"Depends on where you plan on placing 'em."

"Not up your ass, if that's what your thinking."

"…don't be such a smartass, Kev."

"I'm not! It was a joke! C'mon, Dave. Where are they?"

"Bottom drawer in the oak cabinet. Brown paper bag."

"…found 'em!"

"Are you giving them away?"

"No. Why would I? She gave them to us."

"Because you wanted them."

"So?"

"Just checking."

"How's the book?"

"Interesting. Shouldn't you be studying to retake that S.T.A.R.S. exam again?"

"I will later. I'm cooking dinner so don't come out here until I say so."

"Don't tell me you're cooking another roast again…"

"Oh hell no! I learned my lesson the last time I cooked that!"

"Yeah, after I made you clean it up."

"It was an accident!"

"That's not what Alyssa called it."

"Ouch. Don't remind me about what she said."

"What that— "

"I said don't, Dave!"

"You knew that her and Yoko would be here and I told you to prepare early and to read the cookbook carefully!"

"I know! I did! At least, I thought I was doing a decent job..."

"Until it exploded and nearly damaged our stove. Christ, Kev. Do you know how much I had to spend just to make sure it was still okay to use?"

"Probably more then my life, I'll bet."

"You got that right."

"Well, tonight is special. So no roast and if anything explodes I'll pay for it this time."

"That doesn't sound too reassuring."

"I know. Just trust me this time okay? What I'm making should be okay and it doesn't take a genius to cook this particular dish and not make it explode."

"I know. Your IQ level dropped several points the last time."

"It was a month ago!"

"And you haven't cooked a single meal since then."

"Because you wouldn't let me!"

"My point exactly. So going back to the original topic; why did you ask for the candles?"

"I'm not telling you, Dave. Tonight is special."

"How special?"

"You can come out now. Dinner's ready."

"Kev, I don't see why— "

"Ta-da!"

"Spaghetti and meatballs with choice of garlic bread or bread with butter."

"And wine to drink."

"Who gave you the wine?"

"Gosh Dave, you have to analyze everything that I do? Okay, George. It's from George, for _us._ It's from his collection."

"Then what's the occasion?"

"Look around."

"……"

"Figured it out yet?"

"Should've figured from the colors and the arrangement…including the candles."

"Well?"

"You didn't burn anything from what I can tell."

"No. Nothing at all. I took my time this time around and actually made a dinner that worked for both our sakes. Sit."

Kevin takes David's hands in his and smiles at his life partner.

"Happy Valentine's Day, Dave. I love you."


	3. Prt 4 The Bathroom

Continuation to the "Living Can Be" Series.

Cannibal Jello---"Living Together Can Be"

"Living Together Can Be" Parts 2 to now---by me.

Please read the others before this one.

**Warning**: Contains male/male interaction. If this bothers you, please do yourself a favor and not read it. K? You'll only upset yourself further.

**Disclaimer**: I do not own Resident Evil or the first story…but I do however, own this story.

* * *

Living Together Can Be…Gross.

Scene 4: The Bathroom

__

__

"Hey Dave!"

"What?"

"Do we have anymore tee-pee?"

"…tee-pee?"

"Toilet paper."

"Check under the sink."

"…found 'em!"

"You okay in there?"

"No, not really. I think lunch is bothering me."

"You _think _or you _know?_"

"I know. My stomach hurts."

"What did you eat? Beans?"

"Ha ha. Very funny."

"I'm serious."

Sigh. "No."

"…then what?"

"I had a sandwich earlier…"

"Did you eat sourdough?"

"No, wheat. Wheat doesn't bother me like sourdough does."

"Was the mayonnaise or lettuce any good?"

"Possibly."

"…you still trading at work?"

"Occasionally."

"Do it today?"

"Maybe."

"Okay…"

"Okay, yeah. I did. With James."

"What did he give you in exchange for whatever you gave him?"

"Banana milk for my chocolate chip cookies."

"…dumbass."

"What?"

"Chances are he gave you one that expired."

"Why you say that?"

"Because the last time this happened, you were puking your guts out from a rotten egg salad sandwich he traded you."

"…."

"So, you're a dumbass for falling for it twice."

"Am not!"

"And the smell that day was…ugh."

"It was pretty good, wasn't it?"

"What else did you have that day?"

"Besides the salad?"

"Duh."

"Ranch dressing."

"What?"

"I had ranch dressing mixed in with it to counter-act the taste of the salad."

"Fuckin' gross, Kev."

"But it tasted great! Smelled okay, too!"

"It made you sick!"

"It _tasted _great!"

"You're still a dumbass."

Sigh. "I know."

"Was the milk expired or not?"

"Hard to say."

"Did it taste funny?"

"I dunno—hey, Dave!"

"What now, Kev?"

"Come here!"

"Why?"

"Just come here!"

"You couldn't have gone through all four rolls of toilet paper already."

"No, still got plenty."

"Then what?"

"Just come here already!"

"I'm not going to wipe your ass, Kev."

"You _will _once we grow old together."

"That'll be the day…"

"Damn right. Now come here!"

"No."

"Why?"

"Wipe your own ass."

"I'm not asking you to _wipe my ass, _I'm asking you to _come here!_"

"No."

"Please?"

"What do you want? Just tell me."

"It'll be a lot funnier if you just come here…"

"It'll be a lot safer for my health if you _just tell me._"

"Buzzkill."

"Dumbass."

"You'll laugh your ass off, Dave!"

"…it's a poop joke, isn't it?"

Defeated sigh. "Yeah, pretty much."

"Let me guess…if I were to go over there you're gonna tell me that your turd looks a lot like George during a hangover?"

"Um, no. Off the mark."

"Then what?"

"Although that is kinda funny. I'll remember to do that one next time. Anyway, what I was gonna say was that I tried to clone Jim, but I had to flush him down the toilet because he came out the wrong color."

"…."

"…Dave?"

"That actually is kinda funny."

"Told you!" Flushes toilet.

"Do you want me to make you some soup with crackers?"

"Nope. Made plenty of it in the bowl."

"…sick bastard."

"You want Chinese? I'm in the mood for Chinese."

"How could you after what you just—Christ, Kevin!"

Triumphant smile. "Smells great, don't it!"

"It's…it's…"

"A masterpiece!"

"Gut wrenching! Jesus Kevin, open the damn window!"

"Bask in the glory that is of me!"

"I'll bask you in the glory that is of my fist if you _don't open the damn window!_"

"Okay, okay! Geez."

Opens window.

"Fuckin' disgusting, Kevin."

"It was a good one!"

"Did you wash your hands?"

"No."

"Do it. I won't touch you unless you do."

"Fine. I will."

"And no Chinese. You're eating soup and crackers."

"But Dave—"

Sloshing noise is heard.

"Oh shit—"

"KEVIIIIN!"

"…should've flushed before using too much tee-pee."

"Kevin, dammit! You clogged the toilet—again!"

"Again?"

"Yes, again?"

"…."

"I _hate_ cleaning up after you!"

"Well…"

"Well what?"

"You're a plumber, right? Can't you fix it?"

"…."

"Dave?"

"…."

"Davey?"

"…."

"Uh…snookums?"

"…leave."

"Huh?"

"Leave this apartment before I decide to kick your ass. You promised me you wouldn't say that as long as we were together."

"Ouch…forgot."

"Leave before I change my mind about giving you a head start."

Kevin grabs keys and disappears.

Chuckle. "Dumbass. Now I get to have the whole apartment to myself _and _I get to clean up his mess."

Starts gathering his tools.

"Chinese does sound good…"


End file.
